Not too long-ago school started and this can be a difficult time for parents and of course for the children. Routines are totally disrupted by the start of the scholastic year and new ones have to be created. This is where separation anxiety comes in. Most children between the ages of 1 to 5 years will experience some form of separation anxiety at one point and it is a totally normal thing so please don’t blame yourself as a parent, thinking you are doing something wrong because you aren’t! Check out these few tips that can help you reduce the anxiety for your child before they leave school or you go to work.
Quick Goodbye!
Do not prolong the goodbye. The longer the goodbye, the more anxiety builds over time. Try to make up a fun little goodbye ritual maybe a secret handshake or triple cheek kisses or maybe give them a toy to take with them who will watch out for them when you are gone. Whatever you do just make it short and sweet!
Attention!
During the goodbye, ritual give your child your full attention no matter how busy you are but do not fuss over the tears if they start. Once the goodbye ritual is complete, that’s your time to exit.
Be specific and honest!
Do not promise times you’ll be back and fail to stick to it. Sometimes it might be easier to lie and say I’ll be back in an hour and then return 5 hours later. Children are intelligent and will know that you broke that promises. This creates untrust between you and your child in turn making the next goodbye more tearful and overwhelming. So if you prefer to avoid tears, we suggest you be honest and be specific. What do we mean by this? If you are picking them up after school, explain to them after their second break they will have one more lesson and then you will be waiting outside for them. If you are going to work you can say ” I’ll be home after your nap and before your afternoon snack’ this way they will understand when you are coming rather than saying at 3 o’clock I’ll be home.
Practice.
School has already started so unfortunately, you won’t get much time to practice as you are currently going through the process but if you are currently at home with younger children and are planning to go back to work soon, try to get your children to use to you not being there. Take them to your parents to spend some quality time with them, let a friend babysit or have a date with your partner and book a babysitter. These small-time periods apart give your child some time to adapt to being with others and spending time apart from you.
Stay calm!
It is never a nice thing to see your child cry especially if you feel like you caused it. You need to keep in mind that you working or them going to school is a normal thing and nothing you should feel guilty about. So do stay calm! The more nervous and anxious you get the more your child will feel it.
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